More Best (Worst) Dad Jokes Ever

• Did you hear about the cat that ate a lemon? Now it's a sour pus

• What did the police say to his belly button? You're under a vest

• What did one hat say to the other? Stay here I'm going on a head

• I have a joke about pizza... but it's too cheesy

• I have a joke about a pencil... but it's pointless

• Today my son asked can I have a book Mark. I totally burst into tears, he's 11 years old and still doesn't know my names Brian

• What did the slow tomato say to the others? Don't worry I'll Ketchup

• Why did the meatballs tell the spaghetti to go to sleep? It was pasta bedtime

• I like telling Dad jokes. Sometimes he laughs!

• Why should you never date a baker? I've been told their too kneady.

• Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use a honeycomb

• How did the skeleton know it was about to rain? He could feel it in his bones

• What's brown and sticky? A stick!

• What do you call cheese that's not yours. Nacho cheese

• I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes. Turns out it was the refrigerator all along!

• How does the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it!

• How much do roofs cost! Nothing, they're on the house

• Did you pick your nose? No I was born with it

• I used to be a baker, but I couldn't make enough dough

• Sundays are always a little sad, but the day before it is a sadder day

• Why did the candle quit his job? He felt burned out 

• My boss told me to have a good day, so I went home

• I had a date last night and it was perfect. Tomorrow I'll have a fig.

• I started arguing with my son in the elevator. Turns out I was wrong on all levels

• Why does a duck have feathers? To cover up his butt quack!

• Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use a honeycomb